( he touched kavinsky. he knows how shit he feels on the inside, below all that surface level bullcrap. adam was never involved with him, not like ronan, but he still can't say literally any of it was a surprise. kavinsky was a seventeen year old disaster; an addict, an asshole, the guy people went to when they wanted something and adam can't imagine it was ever kavinsky himself that they were after. )
[ how could it? he died at his lowest moment. second chances don't just happen. you don't wake up and shrug off all your damage and become a new man. it lingers, like scabs slowly turning into scars. every wrong move tears you open anew. ]
( it's fine. no one else can hear him call out ronan. )
Because you watched him die before, didn't you? And he's like you. You don't want to leave him here on his own because you know he'll just end up getting himself into shit he shouldn't be in. And you also know you can't stop him, because he'll do whatever he wants regardless. But at least you can try and offer him somewhere he can come to when it all comes crashing down around him again.
( fingers moving from ronan's shoulder down to his chest, over his heart. taps twice against him as adam shifts up to press a kiss against his chin. )
( head tilting, so he can press a kiss to the corner of ronan's lips. he's--concerned. less about kavinsky, more about the impact this will have on ronan. but he does trust him, so. )
Promise me you won't let him drag you into any of his bullshit.
We were in the safehouse, ( because he's not going to follow kavinsky out to a club, thank you very much. adam shifts his weight up onto his hand pressing against ronan's chest, uses it to raise himself up a little. nips gently at ronan's lower lip. ) I'm not following him into a club.
( a low hum, lips curling at the corners. )
I'd maybe follow you into one. Maybe. On a good day.
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( because he. can't remember anything else that would have been his handiwork. )
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[ lazily wrapping an arm around his decidedly better at sleeping boyfriend. ]
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( oh good, cuddling. just give him a second to--slide up a bit, and adam tucks his face down against ronan's neck. )
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[ smh kavinsky.
he walks his fingers along the plain of adam's back. ]
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( he touched kavinsky. he knows how shit he feels on the inside, below all that surface level bullcrap. adam was never involved with him, not like ronan, but he still can't say literally any of it was a surprise. kavinsky was a seventeen year old disaster; an addict, an asshole, the guy people went to when they wanted something and adam can't imagine it was ever kavinsky himself that they were after. )
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[ how could it? he died at his lowest moment. second chances don't just happen. you don't wake up and shrug off all your damage and become a new man. it lingers, like scabs slowly turning into scars. every wrong move tears you open anew. ]
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( fist uncurling so he can lay his hand down against ronan's shoulder, gentle pressure. )
We'll work out the rest.
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[ don't call him out, adam. ]
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( it's fine. no one else can hear him call out ronan. )
Because you watched him die before, didn't you? And he's like you. You don't want to leave him here on his own because you know he'll just end up getting himself into shit he shouldn't be in. And you also know you can't stop him, because he'll do whatever he wants regardless. But at least you can try and offer him somewhere he can come to when it all comes crashing down around him again.
( fingers moving from ronan's shoulder down to his chest, over his heart. taps twice against him as adam shifts up to press a kiss against his chin. )
Am I close?
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He's still fucking dangerous, Adam. I haven't forgotten the shit he pulled.
[ but he's also not wrong. ]
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( you know, the idiots and assholes. )
We'll keep an eye on him.
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You sure?
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( honestly that's probably preferable but. )
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It's gonna be a bitch to get him clean.
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( how else. . are they going to get him clean, honestly. )
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( not entirely where he saw his life going but. there are worse places. )
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Deal.
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( this is his life and he did choose this and he has zero regrets. )
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[ poor poor kavinsky. ]
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Promise me you won't let him drag you into any of his bullshit.
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[ playful, tilting his head a little to catch adam's lips. ]
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( a low hum, lips curling at the corners. )
I'd maybe follow you into one. Maybe. On a good day.
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[ hmmm. sliding a hand up along adam's side, shoving his shirt up. ]
Guess we are overdue for a night out.
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